Loss

"Don't grieve.  Anything you lose comes round in another form."    -Rumi

Usually, I consider Rumi to be kind of a cool dude.  I will grant that perhaps he is right, and that losses may somehow come back around in another form.  I think I may have experienced that on occasion-rare occasion.  However, I really think old Rumi missed the boat on grieving.  I think grief is part of the passage of healing.  All of that pain, remorse, regret, sorrow-cannot and will not be denied.  I believe that to deny those kinds of feelings is tantamount to throwing yourself under the train.

There are all kinds of loss:  the loss of the first tooth, the loss of a job, the loss of a loved one, the loss of a possession, the loss of that first breath of a baby just born-ad infinitum.  What they all seem to have in common is that they leave a space; a space that yearns to be somehow filled.  In some cases, that seems to take care of itself-the baby tooth is replaced by a permanent one; the old job is replaced by a better one.  But there are losses that cross your heart like fault lines-they become cracks that are never fully filled.

I have found that one can easily fall into those unfilled cracks, sinking down into a blackness that appears to never end.  I have also been fortunate enough to have been pulled out of that blackness just long enough to realize that unfilled cracks have another purpose-it is through some of these cracks that light glimmers in.  The fault lines still cross your heart, yes, but climbing out of the blackness is akin to the process of grieving-it is something one must wade into to get to the other side.

As to the other side-things are not the same-they can't be.  The universe has been rendered different forever because of that loss.  The light's glimmer will eventually come through, and the healing can begin.

So, Rumi, old man, I guess we will just have to agree to disagree on this one.  I don't know that every loss comes round in another form, but I do know that those whose hearts have fault lines filled with light are not lost-they are the beacons that lead the way for those still lost in the dark.