Dust

Many years ago, I gave my mother a little plaque that read "Dull women have immaculate homes".  A few years ago, as we prepared to move her out of the house she'd lived in for almost fifty years and into an independent living facility closer to family, that was one of the few things I wanted to keep that she was ready to let go of.

The house I grew up in would never have been deemed immaculate, but it certainly was never dull.  People passed through our door that one would not expect to see in the average Middle American home-former Green Berets, a future U.S. President, drug addicts, ladies who lunched and those that most certainly did not-none of which I thought of as unusual at the time.

That most precious plaque sits on my living room mantel, that yes, at times, can get to be quite dusty.
It is a reminder that imperfection is to be embraced, not shunned.  Having spent far too much energy and time in my early years reaching for that pinnacle of perfection that is, in fact, unreachable for some very good reasons, I actually allow the dust to pile up every once in awhile.  It is a small reminder that life is meant to be lived, not shut off in some china box to be dusted on a weekly basis, only to be brought out on special occasions.  And yes, sometimes it does go against the grain, and the thought that I might somehow be "caught" having a dusty house does occasionally creep back in.
During those times, I once again take my mother's lead-fresh flowers and iced tea make for great distractions.  Mother was right.  Dusty trumps dull hands down every time.

Integrity

"Perhaps the surest test of an individual's integrity is his refusal to do or say anything that would damage his self-respect."    -Thomas S. Monson


Integrity is a word many of us choose to live by, yet do not know the definition of.  We don't really need to-we recognize it when we see or experience it, and are painfully aware of occasions when we don't.  It has become one of the traits I value most in other people and myself.

My father taught me to be courteous to everyone; that being courteous had nothing to do with the other person, yet spoke volumes about myself.  I believe that was my first lesson in learning about integrity-that my response to a situation or person need not be based on anything outside my own self-worth and dignity.

There was a time long ago, in my early years, that I misplaced my integrity.  Needless to say, it was by far, the most miserable of times.  However, the lessons learned during that time have proved to be invaluable.  Most importantly, I learned never to trade on, settle for less than, or compromise my own integrity.  I also learned that another person's integrity, or lack thereof, is none of my business.  "To thine own self be true" is not just another trite saying-these are words to live by.